1324 Slices
Medium 9781605099224

Fourteen Our Journey in Review

Barbara McAfee Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub



It is good to have an end
to journey toward, but
it is the journey that
matters in the end.

Ursula K. Le Guin


We began this journey into your full voice by defining what vocal presence is: the state where your words, facial expressions, body language, tone of voice, emotions, imagination, and spirit are all fully engaged and congruent in conveying your message.

• How frequently is this state available to you in your day-to-day conversations and presentations?

• When you look back at the Full Voice Assessment you took at the beginning of the book, what has changed in your voice? What’s the same?

Next we tackled some big ideas to set a context for the rest of our exploration: evolution, the oral tradition, and how your voice is directly connected to your identity.

• How has your identity changed since you started exploring vocal presence?

• Have you reclaimed parts of your identity through your voice?

• Have you left aspects of your identity behind?

• How has your story about who you are shifted? If so, how did that happen?

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Medium 9781576755846

14 The Path to War

The Arbiner Institute Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

Avi yanked himself from the memory of his suicide attempts and looked squarely at Carol.

“So no, Carol,” he said, “my stuttering was not the cause of my problems. Rather, I carried a heart at war—a heart at war with others, myself, and the world. I had been using my stuttering as a weapon in that war and had gotten myself into a place where I was seeing and feeling crookedly and self-justifyingly. That was my problem. And I wasn’t able to find my way out of it until I found my way out of my need for justification.”

“How were you able to do it?” Carol asked, her voice barely more than a whisper. “How did you get rid of your need for justification?”

Avi smiled at her. “That, Carol, will be our topic for tomorrow.”

“You’re going to leave it at that?” Lou asked Avi. “You just told us you tried to commit suicide twice and now we’re just going to leave for the evening?”

Avi chuckled. “You want to hear more about it?”

“Well, I don’t know,” Lou pulled back. “Maybe.”

“I’ll tell you more about it tomorrow,” Avi promised. “But in our last forty minutes or so this evening, I think it would be best to review what we’ve covered today. That way, we’ll come back tomorrow with a solid understanding.

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Medium 9781855759169

CHAPTER EIGHT: Childreamatrix: dreaming with preschool children— or, bootlegging dreams into the school years

W Gordon Lawrence Karnac Books ePub

Ron Balamuth

The impetus for starting a social dreaming matrix with children came after participating in a social dreaming matrix led by Gordon Lawrence. I could not have anticipated how radically my understanding of dreams and dreaming would change. Over years of listening and telling dreams with patients and colleagues, psychoanalysts accumulate many procedural assumptions. I entered the matrix believing that dreams are very much a personal creation, an individual idiom, and an expression of a person’s essential self, a bit like a psychic fingerprint. For me, it crystallizes the dreamer’s preoccupations, the conscious and unconscious life into a summary image or narrative. While I was attracted to Jung’s formulations about the collective unconscious and its expression in humans’ dreams and waking life, I could not find immediate application to those notions in my clinical work. The next three days of sharing dreams with my colleagues in the matrix were like a gradual process of relaxing the grasp of the old analytic convictions about dreams. Most supportive of this process of surrendering and letting go was the gradual appreciation of the life of the matrix, a grouping that becomes like a sensitive and intelligent instrument of thinking and finding connections. The difference between interpreting dreams and associating to dreams may appear subtle on the page, but in the dream matrix it made all the difference for me and for the other analysts and therapists. There was no need to be more clever than the dreams nor than the dreamer. As we gradually let go of our habitual analytic algorithms, a new appreciation of the aesthetic coherence of the matrix was shared, leading to feelings of joy in discovering new meanings.

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Medium 9781576751329

15. Accept when Failure ws Really Failure

Charles C. Manz Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub


Author Sydney Finkelstein recently wrote an article in which he outlined several factors that contributed to the dot-com collapse of 2000– 2001.28 Among those was an apparent overly positive embrace of failure as an end in itself. Finkelstein points out that the assumption that failure will necessarily lead to learning is not always true. Many Internet company executives, especially young and inexperienced ones, developed a cavalier attitude toward failure, taking actions that were quite harmful to their firms. From Finkelstein’s view, real failure, rather than adaptive long-term-oriented learning, was the dominant result.

Throughout this book I have tried to make it clear that what we call failure is usually only a temporary setback or a “challenge in progress.” Sometimes, however, failure really is failure and we need to accept it for what it is. This requires that we face it honestly and avoid going too far to redefine it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to reverse this book’s theme 180 degrees and suddenly say that we should look at failure as a dead end and as a trigger for guilt and remorse. Rather, I’m saying we need to recognize that sometimes failure is just that—failure—so we need to face it honestly, take from it what we can, and get on with moving beyond it.

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Medium 9781576752296

10: The Power of Little Things to Make a Big Difference

Paul Levesque Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

Man does not simply exist but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become in the next moment.


A fragment from a large cardboard box lies in the middle of one of two eastbound lanes on the interstate highway. One after another, advancing cars swerve to avoid it. A car comes to a stop on the shoulder, and the driver waits for a safe break in the flow of traffic to approach the piece of cardboard and drag it off the roadway. The driver then returns to the stopped car, and drives off.

Why would this person take the time to stop and do something that no one would ever even know about?

All of the five dreamcrafting macroskills are equally critical to success; none can be neglected without placing the mission in serious jeopardy. But in closing, we come to the one most likely among all five to be neglected—and not because it is particularly difficult, but rather because it is particularly easy. In a rare inversion of the law of diminishing returns, this fifth macroskill represents a case of augmenting returns. If the four preceding macroskills have been applied with any success, then the hardest part of the job is done; what remains is to apply some of the same principles and techniques on a smaller scale, in a simpler context, and reap benefits that are often proportionately much greater. Many will fail to do so, primarily on the (incorrect) assumption that anything this simple can’t possibly be too important.

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