35 Chapters
Medium 9781626563476

Chapter Five: Do They Trust You Enough?

Kaye, Beverly; Jordan-Evans, Sharon Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

Do they trust you enough? We hope the answer is yes.

Some people said we could skip this chapter, that everyone already knows about this. Others said that trust has nothing to do with stay interviews. Still others said that this book would be incomplete without a trust chapter. We’re with them!

We’ve noticed that trust has everything to do with stay interviews. In fact, trust (actually lack of trust) is often the “elephant in the room.” No one wants to really talk about it or recognize it, so we talk over it, under it, around it. Ultimately, though, the elephant is in the way, so we have to acknowledge it. And often we need to do something about it!

Think back to a time when you had a manager you didn’t completely trust. How might a stay interview have gone? Here is what some in this situation have said:

“I consciously kept all conversations with her light, even superficial.”

“I avoided telling the truth about how I really felt or what I really wanted.”

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Medium 9781626563476

Chapter Eight: Does Practice Make Perfect?

Kaye, Beverly; Jordan-Evans, Sharon Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

Does practice make perfect? It gets you closer.

We’ve asked dozens of managers how they get ready for stay interviews. What follows are a few of their answers. Which approaches do you already use? Which new ones might work for you?

Wait, isn’t hunch a noun? Yes. And today it’s also a new verb: an action you take as you prepare for the stay interview.

One manager hunched, “She’s brilliant. In fact, she’s one of the best nurses we’ve ever hired. I can’t imagine losing her—and I have no idea if we’re vulnerable or not. I pondered that question, along with several others. Is she happy here? Is there something missing? Is she ready for a new challenge? My hunch is that she might want to learn something new, or she could be ready for a bigger job.”

That’s all there is to it. It’s guessing, but it’s guessing based on paying attention to what you know and what you’ve seen and heard. It’s not magic and it’s not just an intuitive sense, although intuition certainly might play a part.

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Medium 9781609948849

4 Dignity Show Respect

Kaye, Beverly; Jordan-Evans, Sharon Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

Ponder this: In how many ways do you show you respect them?

What kind of boss would your employees say you are? Would they say that you are smart, dedicated, motivating, hard-charging? How about results oriented, demanding, or fun to work with? Just as you tolerate a range of behaviors from your employees, so, too, your employees will accept you as you are, no doubt less than perfect but doing your best.

The one behavior that talented people seldom tolerate for long is disrespect. If you wish to keep them, it is absolutely critical that you recognize each person’s unique qualities and then demonstrate your respect in consistent, undeniable ways.

Alas

We lost one of our most important paralegal assistants. Every attorney in our office counted on her, and we were shocked to see her go. In her exit interview, she said it was not the pay or perks that caused her to seek a new job. It was the daily and weekly indignities that she suffered while trying to do her best in this job. Her performance review (and possible raise) had been overlooked for the past six months. Her request to join an association of paralegals still lay on her boss’s desk after six weeks. She was denied attendance at a free seminar that would have benefited the firm, because they couldn’t free her up. She had not been thanked for her hard work and excellent results. Her boss grunted and vented and took out his frustrations on her without giving it a second thought. She finally left the firm because she did not feel respected or valued, but she did feel used and demeaned. And everyone noticed.

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15 Opportunities Mine Them

Kaye, Beverly; Jordan-Evans, Sharon Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

Ponder this: Will they find the next opportunity inside or outside your organization?

What does this say?

OPPORTUNITY ISNOWHERE

The optimists among you read, Opportunity is now here!

The pessimists see, Opportunity is nowhere.

Still others of you are pretty sure it says, Opportunity I snow here (and we’d like to meet with you later . . .).

While this exercise usually brings a chuckle, it also underscores the truth about your employees and their perceptions about what’s possible in your organization. Some scan the horizon and see absolutely no opportunities to learn or grow or be challenged. Others scan the same horizon and see an opportunity-rich environment. They envision possibility where others see nothing. What accounts for the difference? Often, it’s the manager.

Love ’em managers help their talented people find opportunities inside the organization. These engagement-focused managers learn how to “opportunity mine” with the people they count on to stay and to bring their best to work every single day.

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13 Mentor be One

Kaye, Beverly; Jordan-Evans, Sharon Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

Ponder this: What are they learning from you?

People with mentors are twice as likely to stay. And they won’t just stay longer, they’ll produce more.

Senior executives and human resource professionals know this. That’s why mentoring programs around the globe have doubled in numbers in recent years. Companies that want to retain high-performing women and minorities are investing in mentoring programs; some believe good mentoring will break the glass ceiling. Mentoring has become a way not only to transfer crucial skills and knowledge but to inspire loyalty in new employees, emerging leaders, and older workers who might otherwise leave sooner.

Given the hierarchical structure of many Asian cultures, there are already semblances of mentoring in place. The seniors are expected to teach the juniors the ropes while the juniors are expected to obey and learn well so that they can, in turn, teach the next set of juniors.

—Wendy Tan, co-founder Flame Center

Companies are giving creative incentives to mentors, pairing mentors with new hires, and offering group mentoring and online mentoring to hasten the development of management and technical skills. They’re even linking diverse cultures by pairing mentors with their mentees across the globe.

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