50 Chapters
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19 Increasing Self-Esteem

Laurel, Alexander HRD Press, Inc. PDF





Self-esteem is the value you place on yourself. Healthy self-esteem gives you energy to cope with the many challenges you face day-to-day. Sometimes, identity and sense of worth are totally dependent on having a job or being in a relationship. If these end, self-esteem might take a nose dive. When we experience low self-esteem, it doesn’t mean we are failures—many successful people experience self-doubt from time to time. Whatever the reasons for self-esteem being low, people tell us that when they learn to give themselves approval from within, and develop new coping skills, their stress levels go down and their energy goes up—leading to greater self-esteem.

Self-esteem is about understanding yourself, believing in yourself, becoming your own power source, and taking responsibility—making your own choices. The following guidelines are keys to improving self-esteem:

◆ Accept yourself. Accepting yourself as you are now makes it possible for you to grow and develop. When you feel OK about yourself now, you are able to risk change.

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20 Increasing Your Power at Meetings

Laurel, Alexander HRD Press, Inc. PDF



Your Power at Meetings


Holding Meetings

Any meeting gives you a great opportunity to increase your visibility as a powerful and knowledgeable communicator. Reasons for having meetings are to:

Share information

Get members’ views and proposals

Discuss what the group needs to be doing

Carry out legal business

Develop networks

Exchange ideas and experience

Review whether a decision in action is working

Decide on a proposal

Discuss a decision made elsewhere

Develop teamwork

Support a team


There are also several types of meetings:

◆ Informative/advisory: to give and receive information; to keep in touch; to coordinate activities; to record progress toward goals

◆ Consultative: to resolve differences; to involve people; to get to know people

◆ Problem solving: to create ideas; to identify alternative action; to initiate action

◆ Decision making: to generate commitment; to make decisions; to share responsibilities; to initiate action

◆ Negotiating: to create an agreement; to find a solution

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25 Managing Your Anger

Laurel, Alexander HRD Press, Inc. PDF



Your Anger


Anger is part of our emotional spectrum of self-expression, but is all too often either inappropriately expressed—for example, via aggression, manipulation or blame—or denied altogether and repressed inside ourselves, never to see the light of day.

Repressed anger can make us defensive, resentful, anxious, depressed, sad, shallow, and judgmental. In the long term, it can affect the immune system and make you ill. As with many of our feelings, the way in which we deal with anger derives from our early conditioning. Our childhood observation of our role models, such as our parents, dealing with anger will affect how we deal with anger as adults. Gender also has an effect. For example, it is traditionally acceptable for men to demonstrate anger, and we may expect men to be more aggressive than women. Indeed, many women have a problem with anger, because, traditionally, it hasn’t been “proper” for a woman to express this emotion.

Anger can also be a cover-up for fear. A man might believe it is more appropriate to show anger than the fear that he really feels. Anger can also cover up hurt—better to attack or defend than to show vulnerability. Getting angry helps us:

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6 Changing Interpersonal Behavior

Laurel, Alexander HRD Press, Inc. PDF






Are you happy with how you relate to other people? Would you like to be more outgoing or less dominant in a group? Would you like to be able to start up a conversation with anyone or do you need to take a step back?

Let’s take a typical interpersonal behavioral problem: for example, you’re unhappy with your tendency to dominate conversations at social gatherings or meetings. You end up crowding other people out and, as a result, you often alienate them. To rectify the problem, you could take the following steps:

◆ Set a goal (for example, “I’ll stop talking so much when in groups”).

◆ Identify an action you take to alert yourself in typical situations (for example, decide to keep your mouth shut for a while, instead of always jumping into the conversation). However, also consider whether there is a positive action you might be able to take to achieve your goal more fully, such as focusing on listening more to the other person.

◆ Devise a reminder for when you feel yourself slipping into the behavior you want to avoid. For example, if listening is not your natural response when you’re socially stimulated, you need to be reminded of exactly what you should do. However, this reminder will have to be motivational. Because you typically become so stimulated when you’re in the company of others, you conclude that, unless a reminder makes you want to listen, you’ll have trouble doing it. So you decide on a combination reminder. In trying to identify an important reason for taking the trouble to listen when you’d rather talk, it occurs to you that the word friends helps convey what you really want to accomplish—and what you’ve been losing. Therefore, you decide that the reminder

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45 Team Building

Laurel, Alexander HRD Press, Inc. PDF





The purpose of a team is the creation of synergy. This is where the sum of the whole is larger than the sum of each part (individual). Teams are needed when:

◆ There is a need for people to work together

◆ You are experiencing rapid changes

◆ There is uncertainty about a project and you need to share the problems and solutions

◆ You are dealing with a problem where nobody knows the answer

What motivates each of your team members? A team is motivated by:





The concept of team roles was “invented” by Meredith Belbin, one of the foremost experts on team dynamics and the visiting Professor at the

Centre for Leadership Studies at Exeter University. Team roles fall into two categories: their specialist role or responsibility and their team role.

Team Roles

◆ Supporter: team player, concerned with team unit, helpful and supportive to others, mild, diplomatic, dislikes confrontation, adapter rather than changer

◆ Thinker: creative, critical, needs acknowledgment

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