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Chapter Ten - Nothing Fixed: Dialogue with Akashadevi

Maria Pozzi Monzo Karnac Books ePub

Dialogue with Akashadevi

Body like a mountain

Heart like the ocean

Mind like the sky.

—Dogen (1200–1253 CE)

References

Bion, W. R. (1967). Notes on memory and desire. Psycho-Analytic Forum, 2: 272–273; 279–280.

Dogen (1200–1253). Moon in a dewdrop—writings of the Zen Master Dogen. Ed. Kazuaki Tanahashi. New York: North Point Press, 1985.

Sangharakshita (1957). A Survey of Buddhism. Guildford, Surrey: Biddles. (Later editions published by Windhorse, Birmingham.)

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11: “It wasn’t meant to happen like this”: the complexity of mourning great expectations

Maria Pozzi Monzo Karnac Books ePub

Lynne Cudmore

In this chapter I will discuss some aspects of my clinical work in the perinatal service, part of the specialist service for the under-fives age group, based in the Child and Family Department at the Tavistock Clinic in London. The majority of the individuals, couples, parents, and families that I meet struggle with the emotional aftermath of living through traumatic experiences that have occurred during pregnancy, the infant’s birth or the months following. The experience of feeling catapulted into a disaster area where they had previously had great expectations of joy is one they share. There is an inevitable emotional fallout for each individual internally and externally; on relationships within the family, between the parental couple, between parent and infant and with already existing children. Trauma always involves loss (Levy & Lemma 2004) so these experiences need to be mourned if development is to occur; loss has to be acknowledged, grief expressed. But a mourning process might be inhibited by trauma if there is a breakdown in symbolic functioning, the capacity to reflect on lived experience (Garland 1998). The losses that my patients describe can be actual, such as the death of a child, or the loss of an “inside” baby because of a very premature birth; and also symbolic, such as the loss of a sense of self as good and strong, the loss of hope, trust and faith in a benign world. Working through these different layers and aspects of loss is painful to bear and rarely linear. Many factors, both internal and external, influence the meaning that is generated from the experience of “it wasn’t meant to happen like this”.

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CHAPTER ELEVEN: The borderline child and the establishment of internal reins

Maria Pozzi Monzo Karnac Books ePub

Introduction

I found myself in a quandary, once again, in thinking of cases to include in this chapter. Alistair, the boy I discuss, could have easily been included in the chapter on hyperactivity. Equally, children presented in other chapters, such as Pilar in the chapter on hyperactivity or Craig in the chapter on parental guidance, could be diagnosed as borderline children. The difficulty in categorizing borderline children is shared amongst clinicians, who find that many features of the borderline group are similar to those of a range of psychological disorders in childhood. Lubbe writes that the current profile of borderline children is “loaded down as it is with descriptions of conduct disturbance, attention deficit, impulsivity and emotional disregulation” (Lubbe, 2000, p. 6). In his review of the literature on borderline personality disorders, he quotes authors who have outlined some diagnostic features in this type of childhood disorder. He mentions a “rapid shift between psychotic-like and neurotic levels of reality testing; a lack of ‘signal anxiety’ (Freud, 1926) and a proneness to states of panic dominated by overwhelming concern of body dissolution, annihilation and abandonment” (Lubbe, 2000, p. 41). We also find idiosyncratic thinking and disruption of thought processes, impairment in relationships, and a difficulty in distinguishing self from others. There is a lack of impulse control, of the capacity to modulate destructive tendencies and to contain intense feelings. These characteristics are generally thought to define borderline personality in children.

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Chapter Four - Serendipity in the Magic Garden: Dialogue with Deirdre Dowling

Maria Pozzi Monzo Karnac Books ePub

Dialogue with Deirdre Dowling

When you touch one thing with deep awareness, you touch everything. The same is true of time. When you touch one moment with deep awareness, you touch all moments.

—Thich Nhat Hahn

References

Bion, W. R. (1962). Learning from Experience. London: Tavistock.

Dowling, D. (2006). The Capacity To Be Alone: A Question of Technique. London: Routledge.

Suzuki, S. (1970). Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind. New York, Tokyo: Weatherhill.

Thich Nhat Hahn (1992). Touching Peace, The Art of Mindful Living, p. 123. Berkeley, CA: Parallaz Press.

Thich Nhat Hanh (2006). Mindfulness and Psychotherapy, Sounds Tru CD.

Walpole, H. (1754). The Three Princes of Serendip, quoted in a letter written by him to Horace Mann, January 1754.

Winnicott, D. W. (1965). The capacity to be alone. In: Maturational Processes and the Facilitating Environment. London: Hogarth.

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Chapter One - A Baby is Born: Dialogue with Claudia Goulder

Maria Pozzi Monzo Karnac Books ePub

Dialogue with Claudia Goulder

Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without even noticing it, live along some distant day into the answers.

—Rainer Maria Rilke, 1903

References

Bion, W. R. (1967). Notes on memory and desire. Psycho-Analytic Forum, 2: 272–273; 279–280.

Coltart, N. (1996). Buddhism and psychoanalysis revisited. The Baby and the Bathwater. London: Karnac.

Goulder, C. (2012). Cultivating the observer within: A meditation on the links between yoga and psychoanalytic thinking. Unpublished paper.

Klein, M. (1926–1961). The Writings of Melanie Klein, Vol. 1–4. London: Hogarth and the Institute of Psycho-Analysis.

Rilke, R. M. (1903). Letters to a Young Poet. Letter n. 4. London: W. W. Norton, 2004.

Vipassana Research Institute (1997). Doing Time, Doing Vipassana. www.prison.dhamma.org. DVD available at email address: bookstore@pariyatti.org.

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