10 Chapters
Medium 9781782201243

APPENDIX Useful books, articles, and websites

Smith, Maggie Yaxley Karnac Books PDF

APPENDIX

Useful books, articles, and websites

The author has a useful counselling website/blog which contains various counselling tools and a series of relaxation exercises. This is accessed on: counsellingcasestories.wordpress.com

Addiction

Books

Bower, M., Hale, R., & Wood, H. (Eds.) (2013). Addictive States of Mind.

London: Karnac.

Bryant-Jeffries, R. (2006). An addicted society? Therapy Today, 17(2): 4–5.

Ford, C., Oliver, J., & Whitehead, B. (2006). Treating drug users: a collaborative method. Therapy Today, 17(2):17–20.

Liedloff, J. (1989). The Continuum Concept. London: Arkana.

Schaverien, J. (2004). Boarding school: the trauma of the “privileged” child. Journal of Analytical Psychology, 49(5): 683–705.

Sinclair, M. (2010). Fear and Self-Loathing in the City, a Guide to Staying Sane in the Square Mile. London: Karnac.

Wilders S., & Robinson, S. (2006). Addiction: is counselling sufficient?

Therapy Today, 17(2):11–15.

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CASE TWO Shirley and David’s story: finding the heart

Smith, Maggie Yaxley Karnac Books PDF

CASE TWO

Shirley and David’s story: finding the heart

Relationship breakdown ften we are attracted to life partners for the very qualities that can eventually become difficult to us. There can be an unconscious positive and negative fit that is being worked out in any relationship. The specific example used in this chapter is a couple in a heterosexual relationship, but some of these issues are equally commonplace in homosexual relationships. It is common in relationships for us to become “stuck” or “polarised” in terms of power or control, to become preoccupied by a need to be “right” and to make the other person “wrong”. Fear plays a part in this, a fear of not wanting to be controlled by others, a fear of being out of control, a fear of not being good enough, a fear of being vulnerable. What can help us get beyond this “attack” or “defend” position is for us to begin to understand how the other person feels and how we feel ourselves.

It is more difficult to stay being “right” when you can see beyond the logical arguments to the feelings underneath. This understanding increases the trust in the relationship, which makes it easier to move forward to a resolution.

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CASE FOUR Karen’s story: finding a reason to live

Smith, Maggie Yaxley Karnac Books PDF

CASE FOUR

Karen’s story: finding a reason to live

Addiction and abuse

Addiction can be a desire to numb out from overwhelming or frightening feeling, a need to escape from the pain of living into a perceived sense of unity. It can be a way of self-harming and taken to its extreme, an expression of finding it just too unbearable to live in this world anymore; a slow form of suicide. Both addiction and depression can be masking a deep unacknowledged, unexpressed deprivation, loss, longing, fear, hurt, or anger. In the book The Continuum Concept, Jean

Liedloff (1989) states:

Of all the expressions of in-arms deprivation, perhaps research will confirm that one of the most direct is addiction to narcotics like heroin.

Only research will be able to ascertain the precise relationship between deprivation and addiction, and when it does, the many forms of addiction—to alcohol, tobacco, gambling, barbiturates or nail biting—may begin to make sense in the light of the continuum concept of human requirements.

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Medium 9781782201243

Case Two: Shirley and David's story: finding the heart

Smith, Maggie Yaxley Karnac Books ePub

Relationship breakdown

Often we are attracted to life partners for the very qualities that can eventually become difficult to us. There can be an unconscious positive and negative fit that is being worked out in any relationship. The specific example used in this chapter is a couple in a heterosexual relationship, but some of these issues are equally commonplace in homosexual relationships. It is common in relationships for us to become “stuck” or “polarised” in terms of power or control, to become preoccupied by a need to be “right” and to make the other person “wrong”. Fear plays a part in this, a fear of not wanting to be controlled by others, a fear of being out of control, a fear of not being good enough, a fear of being vulnerable. What can help us get beyond this “attack” or “defend” position is for us to begin to understand how the other person feels and how we feel ourselves. It is more difficult to stay being “right” when you can see beyond the logical arguments to the feelings underneath. This understanding increases the trust in the relationship, which makes it easier to move forward to a resolution.

See All Chapters
Medium 9781782201243

Appendix: Useful books, articles, and websites

Smith, Maggie Yaxley Karnac Books ePub

The author has a useful counselling website/blog which contains various counselling tools and a series of relaxation exercises. This is accessed on: counsellingcasestories.wordpress.com

Addiction

Books

Bower, M., Hale, R., & Wood, H. (Eds.) (2013). Addictive States of Mind. London: Karnac.

Bryant-Jeffries, R. (2006). An addicted society? Therapy Today, 17(2): 4–5.

Ford, C., Oliver, J., & Whitehead, B. (2006). Treating drug users: a collaborative method. Therapy Today, 17(2):17–20.

Liedloff, J. (1989). The Continuum Concept. London: Arkana.

Schaverien, J. (2004). Boarding school: the trauma of the “privileged” child. Journal of Analytical Psychology, 49(5): 683–705.

Sinclair, M. (2010). Fear and Self-Loathing in the City, a Guide to Staying Sane in the Square Mile. London: Karnac.

Wilders S., & Robinson, S. (2006). Addiction: is counselling sufficient? Therapy Today, 17(2):11–15.

See All Chapters

See All Chapters